Wednesday

Not a very creative title, but I'm tired, so it will do. It's been pouring rain here for the past couple of days. I normally love the rain, but right now it's just sort of matching my mood. Mr. B left this morning for Oregon. He'll be gone 9 weeks. I already miss him a lot. It was weird coming home after class and not seeing him at his computer working on his application, or in the kitchen cooking dinner. It felt so quiet and empty.

I guess the hardest part is that I've felt like I've been missing a part of myself this past month. This piece that is my parents. And now I'm missing my best friend, my boyfriend. So I'm feeling rather empty. I'm trying to convince myself that this is good for me. It's teaching me how to be happy without other people. How to concentrate on myself and not others. How to grow as a person. Well, so far I'm not mastering anything. But I guess it takes more than 20 hours. More than one month. I just wonder how long it's going to take. How long until I feel whole while I'm missing people I love dearly.

I think the rain is supposed to continue for the rest of the week. Maybe I'll take it as an opportunity to spend some time with myself and learn to grow. Nothing like a little rain to make things bloom.